Each month, "The Balance Sheet" provides questions and answers from experts on a topic that's important to you as a manager. Please feel free to share this information with other colleagues who also manage people.
Q. How many times should I recommend BJC EAP to my employee for an ongoing saga of fights and domestic troubles at home that we hear about? The employee has never followed my recommendation. Should I refer the employee somewhere else?
A. You should continue to recommend BJC EAP to your employee whenever information about a personal problem or serious concern is shared. They will conduct a proper assessment and refer your employee to any specialized source of help. Any other type of recommendation to a source of counseling help, unless in an emergency, would generally be improper. Although your employee has not visited BJC EAP yet, there is a strong possibility it will happen. Why? The problems being experienced by your employee appear to be chronic. This means he or she will likely experience periodic crises that will get worse over time. These crises are opportunities for your employee to choose a healthier path by accepting help from BJC EAP. So continue to recommend it.
Q. I always thought that domestic violence was almost exclusively a behind-closed-doors phenomenon and that the workplace was simply not in the picture. Is domestic violence something employers really need to be concerned with as a business matter?
A. Business and industry are severely affected by domestic violence because of lost productivity, health care costs, absenteeism, turnover, negative effects on workers and direct risks to the workplace when violence comes through the door. The health-related costs of rape, physical assault, stalking and homicide by intimate partners exceeds approximately $6 billion each year. The annual cost of lost productivity due to domestic violence is estimated at $727.8 million, with more than 7.9 million paid workdays lost per year. This vast problem led to the formation in 1995 of the Corporate Alliance to End Partner Violence. Its purpose is to make a difference, and in recent years it has even expanded to help educate young people to support zero tolerance for dating violence in an effort to curb problems with future employees.
Q. An employee says her husband is violent. She won’t go to BJC EAP because she thinks he’ll read her mind and know it. Some employees are worried for her, but he is the only spouse who has brought roses to the office! Frankly, he seems nice. What do you think is going on?
A. There are many possibilities, but you should still encourage her to visit or phone BJC EAP to discuss her situation. A sudden crisis or incident may increase her motivation, but if she is a battered spouse, the reluctance you see now is not inconsistent with how victims of abuse sometimes react. This “battered spouse syndrome” frequently includes a belief or “omnipresent” feeling that the batterer is superior or in control of the victim. The victim may believe she is being watched. This PTSD-like response demonstrates true fear. Batterers sometimes demonstrate a pattern or cycle of growing tension, releasing it through battering, blaming the partner, and then demonstrating remorse and overindulgence (e.g., bringing roses to the office) to make up for the violence. The cycle then repeats. Do not eliminate the possibility of formally referring her to BJC EAP based on the impact on your work environment. It sounds drastic, but such a referral would be EAP-appropriate, and it could save lives.