Each month, “The Balance Sheet” provides questions and answers from experts on a topic that’s important to you as a manager. Please feel free to share this information with other colleagues who also manage people.
Q. My boss called me a stress-monger after some of my employees complained about my hard-charging style. I am not as bad as these employees have made me out to be. If others get stressed because I push them to excel, why is that my problem?
A. If you are as tough as others report, it is your problem because you are contributing to an unhealthy work environment. Employees cannot perform at their best if they report to a supervisor who exerts constant pressure and creates an atmosphere of anxiety. Workplace stress more than doubles the risk of death from heart attack, stroke and other cardiovascular conditions, according to a recent British study. End-running to your boss may indicate that you are not doing what it takes to understand the impact of your work style on employees. Collaborate with your employees when setting ambitious goals, and reward them for superior results. You can damage your career prospects if you develop a reputation as an unrelenting drill sergeant and disappoint your bosses who see complaints, high turnover and surging absenteeism as signs of poor leadership.
Q. I supervise about 20 employees and, frankly, some of them can’t stand my supervision style. Others like my style a lot. Is there any way to get every employee to like a supervisor? Or is it a given that some employees will always dislike me?
A. Rethink your goal. Strive to earn everyone’s respect, even if they do not like your style. Most experienced supervisors would agree that if all 20 workers liked you, it would be a red flag. It could mean that you’re too soft or accommodating. The best supervisors set high standards and motivate employees to exceed their expectations. They also recognize superior effort while pushing underperformers to excel. Expressing criticism and taking disciplinary steps are part of every supervisor’s job, along with enforcing unpopular policies and conveying bad news from senior management. Faced with having to perform so many unpleasant tasks, it’s no wonder that supervisors are often unloved by their staffs!
Q. I’m not sure I’m cut out to supervise people. I hesitate to confront my employees, and I dread meeting with them in a group. Sometimes I delegate supervision to others, and I avoid meeting with complainers. Should I look for another job or use BJC EAP to help me?
A. Before you conclude that you’re not equipped to manage people, discuss your concerns with a BJC EAP consultant. Each of the issues you’ve mentioned is a common challenge that supervisors face. Many supervisors dislike confrontation and take pains to avoid it. You may never learn to enjoy it, but you can develop strategies to communicate clearly and diplomatically in potentially adversarial situations. Dreading team meetings may stem from shyness, discomfort with group dynamics or other factors. BJC EAP can help you develop strategies to assert yourself in groups and become more comfortable leading discussions and giving presentations. Delegation is actually a learned skill. Effective supervisors usually learn that in order to gain power, they have to give some of it up. So the fact that you allow others to step into your role may actually work to your advantage, as long as you remain accountable for the results.